Beginnerhood

You know the feelings you get when starting something new . . . the kaleidoscope of emotions that seem to change the vibrational tone of everything around you . . . even if for just a few moments in time.

Whether you’re embarking on something monumental like changing jobs, starting a business, or beginning a new relationship…

Or something everyday like opening a new book, trying a new recipe, or taking a road trip.

I swear I've had more kaleidoscope moments these last 7 years living on the farm than I’ve had my whole life. And I’ve often wondered why that is.

Could it be the beautiful sunrises?

The epic sunsets?

Watching new life unfold?

Witnessing growth all around?

While each one of these experiences are unique in their beauty, it is their newest that evokes such emotion.

I have a camera roll full of the sun rising behind the same old windmill and setting behind the same barn that’s been there 150 years. Yet they grab my attention as if I’ve never seen one before. And that’s because it’s technically true - each one is new.

With spring on the horizon, the pulse of a new season is palpable. I’m hungry for the arrival of flowers, for brighter light and longer shadows.

And although I cannot wait for it all to start, I also feel the nerves creeping in, and the inner critic is getting louder.

After all, this is only my third season growing flowers.

I’m certain I’ve missed something in my garden plan—I’m already on revision #8.

Will I have more foliage than flowers? Or not enough foliage?

What if the ladybugs don’t return? Will this be the year I get eaten alive by aphids?

And of course, what if no one wants to buy my flowers?

It’s easy to get caught up in a cycle of doubt.

But this year, I’m going back to basics.

Focusing on the fun in the unknown. The excitement in the exploration. The possibility that lies in uncertainty. Finding the opportunity amongst the obstacles.

Holding tight to all the beautiful things about beginning. . .

Will this be the year you embrace your inner beginner? Ready to harness the joy that comes with experiencing something for the first time, again?

I am so excited to get growing! And I can’t wait to share it all with you!